Tuddd's Muddd

7 Shows, 6 Days, 100+ Alcoholic Beverages, Edibles Galore, a Zip of Insane Upstate Outdoor, and Yes [drumroll pls], A FUCKING SPALDING. [PART II]

 
[Nuff said]

[NOTE: as indicated by the above title, the entry you are currently reading completes this post, albeit almost exactly a month later / tardiness duly noted / bite me.  Also, thanks to Ben for supplying a couple of these pictures.]

Wild Yaks at Cameo Gallery + (PARTY TYME), Saturday March 12, 2011

    At about 6 AM I got a phone call from my friend, who we'll call "Cindy Shouts," (hehehheheh), who was coming down from Buffalo for the weekend-plus for some good old-fashioned show-going and good timez... she and her friend, who we'll call "Ben," were rapidly approaching NYC.  About an hour later they were at my doorstep... pleasantries were exchanged, and I was generously bequeathed gifts the likes of which I've rarely seen, including a huge fucking tray of pot brownies (YAY!), an ounce of insane dank (DOUBLE DOG YAY!), a Buffalo Sabres beer coozie (HAHHAHA AWESOME) and a Garfield-themed promotional glass (inside joke).  Since it was still mad early, we retired to our respective sleeping quarters for a few hours before meeting up for a splendid Vietnamese sandwich lunch and, then... retiring to our respective sleeping quarters again, hahaha.

    Picked them up for dinner (Wild Ginger, yummo) before heading first to Radegast for beers and then to Cameo for the Wild Yaks show... apparently I had seen this band before a couple summers ago opening up for Brooklyn's Your Nature (who I enjoyed), but I didn't remember jack shit about 'em.  Before the show I wondered aloud what they sounded like, and was told "beards and yelling." Lamentably, this description turned out to be all too accurate.  [For the record, the yelling was horrendously off-key to boot.]  But the band's suckitude was our gain; fortch I had earlier procured a "saucy grande," AKA a "Spalding," and the time to tap that shit was nigh.

    Not gonna lie -- there are few things in life I enjoy more than combining cheap beer, expensive drugs, and gratuitous musical discussion.  Said enjoyment is amplified exponentially when one's companions have great taste in music, as was the case in this instance.  Snippets of the evening's conversation, each of which still ring true at the time of this (relatively) sober writing:

• Major Stars are FUCKING AWESOME. 
• Sleep's Jerusalem / Dopesmoker is THE SINGLE GREATEST ARTISTIC ACHIEVEMENT BY ANYONE EVER IN THE HISTORY OF EVERYTHING.
• My new apartment beats the shit out of my old place in every possible way.
• I love the new Parts & Labor album, and I'm OK with being a bit obnoxious trying to convert people.  Sue me.
• God fucking dammit do I wish Cindy still lived in Brooklyn. 

    Eventually 4:30 rolled around and my roommate and his girlfriend, who were just getting home, stepped up to the plate (um, literally) and joined the party... Cindy and Ben headed back to their hotel just after sunrise, and the impromptu shindig finally petered out at my place around 8:30 AM.  Yay. (Literally, heheh.)

Harvey Milk with Occultation at Union Pool, Sunday, March 13, 2011

 

    Harvey Milk with Occultation at Union Pool, Sunday, March 13, 2011

    With the previous "evening" not technically ending until mid-morning, none of us were feeling especially spry.  I finally rolled out of bed sometime between 2 and 3 PM before heading out to Saint's Alp on Bedford for some noodles, dumplings, and a lovely smoothie type thingy of some sort.  Bought a couple of pricey muffins (Muffins! WHEEE!) on the way home before contacting Cindy and Ben; at this point in the day, for some reason I felt like a million bucks; suffice it to say my comrades did not.  It was agreed that we would meet up at Union Pool not much before the show was supposed to start so as to provide for an ample opportunity for further recharging of batteries.

    One indication that I'm majorly scrambled is when I have trouble narrowing down my pre-show intoxicant choices.  With so many options at my disposal (blow, weed, pot brownies, ketamine, moon rocks, alcohol, nitrous, etc.) I decided a sugar-free Red Bull and a healthy portion of Cindy's pot brownies would be the evening's preferred speedball. 

    As things turned out, "doors at 8" turned into "doors at 9," with the opening band, Occultation, not starting their set until about 9:40 PM.  Ouch.  But, in this case, the good thing about an interminably delayed show was that by the time the band started playing, I was fucking FLYING, which was the perfect recipe for enjoying Occultation's doom / stoner / prog / psych / ultra-reverby bag.  I quite liked these guys. 

    By setbreak, my head was fucking spinning.  [AWESOME.]  As I hung tight to my spot on the right side of the stage, more jackasses began elbowing and jostling for position... this is what happens when you have a sold out show at Union Pool via 'small room / obnoxious entitled scenesters n' posers.'  But what can ya do.

    The mighty Harvey Milk took the stage and greeted us by playing their newest release, last year's A Small Turn of Human Kindness, in its ENTIRETY.  Yes, you read that right: top to bottom, front to back, head to toe, the crowd was treated to a complete run-thru of what's arguably the bleakest, most oppressively cheerless piece of music ever committed to tape.  To start the show.  Yep.

    Which, needless to say, was fucking AWESOME.  A Small Turn may have been described as "a huge, steaming pile of unpleasantness, completely inappropriate for anyone who spends less than half their day plotting the deaths of themselves/others" by, uh, me, but I somehow managed to glean some honest-to-goodness beauty from this live rendition.  Or maybe it was the brownies.  Either way, my grin was ear-to-ear througout the whole thing.

    Oh, but there was more.  Earlier in the set Harvey Milk main man Creston Spiers had suggested the following to the audience: "we'll play for as late as they'll let us, as long as we don't have to play an encore."  Sir, you've got yourself a deal!  They then proceeded to plow through another 40 minutes of classics, including personal faves "Shame," "Motown," and "I Do Not Know How to Live My Life."  Great show, and Harvey Milk's was easily one of the best sets I've seen all year. 

    As for post-show, we were all still pretty shot from the previous evening's coke-besotted blowout, so after a couple quick beers at my place we pulled the plug and called it a night, and wisely so.

    [I doubt any enterprising tapers captured this set, but go here for an EXCELLENT recording from the Harvey Milk set from two nights later.]

 

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Godspeed You! Black Emperor at Terminal 5, Monday, March 14, 2011,

    Godspeed You! Black Emperor is a band that I figured I'd never see live, and for many reasons.  For one, they hadn't played a live show in nearly 10 years.  For two, there are like ten people in the band, and shepherding them all together couldn't be that simple after all this time (could it?).  For three, given Godspeed's shadowy reputation as highly principled anarcho-enviro-socialists (um, or something), they seem like the last band in the world that would reunite behind the strength of absolutely NO new material for a quick n' dirty Filthy Lucre-tastic cash-grab-o-rama world tour.

    But I'm glad that they did.  I was actually originally thinking of skipping Godspeed on this tour despite them playing so many NYC dates (was it four? five?) because, frankly, the venues they had chosen in which to perform (Terminal 5 and Brooklyn Masonic Temple) are the two absolute WORST-sounding shitboxes I've ever set foot in.  But my mind was changed by three things: 1.) Cindy's visit, and she already had a ticket; 2.) as mentioned earlier, Cindy's brownies would be visiting, and I could see Godspeed being PERFECT on one of her borderline psychedelic treatz; 3.) Tix for the Terminal 5 show could be had for a reasonable price (about $40).  SOLD!

    Anyway, the hours leading up to the show were totally uninteresting, so I'll fast-forward to meeting up with Cindy and Ben at Terminal 5.  We snuck up reasonably close on the left side of the stage, away from the seemingly constant shuffle of feet, the horrendous echo chamber, the mind-bogglingly atrocious sight lines, and the terrible echo chamber effect you get well, pretty much anywhere else in this room. 

    Once again, my enjoyment of the opening act was greatly enhanced as a result of the cartoonishly large hunk of brownie I consumed.  On this night, Colin Stetson opened, he of the cartoonishly large bass saxophone and the flawless circular breathing technique.  Stetson wrangled so many disparate sounds out of his instrument that I initially thought he was utilizing some sort of sampler, but apparently he was creating all of the tones and textures live without effects, which is pretty astounding.  Yup, I enjoyed his set (which can be downloaded here).

    Finally Godspeed was up.  And not 'finally' because setbreak took forever or nuthin' like that.  'Finally' because this would 'finally' be the 'final' set I would see over this 6 day, 7 show, 12 band shitzaster.  Deep breaths, everyone.

    Of course, this set was truly epic.  I am going to do my best to forego too much flowery fudgepackery here, but what a great, great, great band.  A few notes:

• When discussing the vaguely-defined, unfortunately-named "post rock" genre, Godspeed is undeniably king.  More virtuosic than Mogwai, grander than Sigur Ros, more dynamic and diverse than Explosions in the Sky, and just plain better in every way than bands like Tortoise, Maserati, Trans-Am, Red Sparowes, and on and on.
• For someone that has spent altogether too much time taking in limp, uninspired sets by atrocious trendy Bushwick shitgaze / laptop pop / krustcock / twee / post-smegma / whatever acts over the past several years, the Godspeed concert experience is a revelation.  And the respectful crowd combined with the emotive, dramatic nature of the music to somehow make the show seem more intimate than it should have seemed, considering the 3000-strong attendance.
• The set lasted about 2 hours, 20 minutes, lengthy by nearly anyone's standard.  However, at no point did it feel like they had overstayed their welcome.
• From what I remember, the band was accompanied by provocative images / phrases projected on the wall at the back of the stage.  That's all well and good, but in my state, listening intently with eyes closed tight worked just fine, thankyouverymuch-ah. 
• I have NEVER heard Terminal 5 sound this great, which is really a feat considering the (assumed by me) difficulty of micing and amplifying so many instruments.  [If ya don't believe that it sounded great, hear for yourself.] 

    Post show, we walked a few blocks along 11th Ave. before grabbing a cab back to the the uber-hip Ace Hotel, where Cindy and Ben had a room.  [How hip?  Well, the desk in the room was already scratched to shit due to previous occupants cutting up narcotics on its surface.  THESE ARE MY PEOPLE!!!]  After wandering around for awhile in search of ABSOLUTELY ANYWHERE THAT WOULD SELL US BOOZE, we very cumbersomely and awkwardly bought about 20 loose Bud tall boys at a Rite Aid, and the party was on. 

    As fun as the show was, the remainder of the evening > early morning was probably funner.  More music geekery, improbably vitriolic arguments (which is the poppiest Sleater-Kinney song ever?!?), dance party starring Ting Tings and Hercules & Love Affair, more Jerusalem / Dopesmoker (of course!), and let's not forget that spalding.  I seem to remember finally cabbing it back to Williamsburg circa 6:30 AM, borderline blacked out, grinning like a retard.  

    So, across the board, GREAT.  FUCKING.  TIME.  Come back any time, y'alls.   

 

[Was it something I said?]

The Best Albums of 2010

"Another year has come and passed.

Quick, you poo stabber!  Bring on '11 fast!" [shakes fist at God]

--Maya Angelou

    So, another shitty year!  Here's a list of crappy shit that happened to me this year. much of which I've already bitched about on this blog:

--Big, scary fire at my mom's house, during which mom awoke on top of a BURNING MATTRESS and was lucky to escape unharmed.  Alas, the business that I run out of mom's house wasn't so fortunate. 

--My car was broken into twice.

--A third time that my car was broken into, it was stolen by some punk-ass neighborhood kids who tried to extort $$$ out of me before giving the car back.  Eventually I wound up stealing the car back from these brainless pieces of shit before the cops informed me that since they were too fucking stupid to figure out how to register the car as "unstolen," it was probable that I would be arrested at gunpoint for DRIVING MY OWN CAR. 

--Apartment was robbed; they grabbed my poor roommate's computer, a pile of unused MetroCards which I had accumulated while volunteering last year, and, um, some of my "saucies" in addition to grabbing my car keys, thus leading to the above automobile thievery.  Motherfuckers. 

--Was informed that if I want to cure my extremely severe case of sleep apnea, I would likely need to undergo a surgical procedure wherein the doctor would basically rip the lower part of my face off, break my jaw, and insert an extension and screws into said jaw before a 7 month healing period characterized by "at times excruciating pain" and "inability to chew [my] own food."  Where do I sign up?!

--Got mugged. 

--Cliff Lee chose the City of Brotherly Love/inhumanly awful, despicably heartless, projectile vomiting white trash over the Big Apple.  God fucking dammit!

--Had over a grand swiped out of my checking account when someone stole my ATM card at my birthday party. 

--Perhaps worst of all, no Cheeseburger album this year, despite the fact that they supposedly have one all recorded and ready to go.  Seriously, have you heard any of the garbage that kids are listening to these days?  Rock and Roll ain't gonna save itself.  GET ON THAT SHIT DUDES!

--Friends came, friends went, and still yet another friend set out on an absurdly improbable (yet also absurdly awesome) journey of self-discovery.  To those that stuck around, I love you all.  To the lousy chickenshit assholes who didn't, please feel free to sit on one of these and rotate. 

    Well now!  List time.  Here's the rules and assorted deets.

• This is not an "all the albums I heard in '10 ordered from best to worst" list.  No way Jose.  These are the cream of the crop from the 90+ new albums I heard this year.
• This list only includes albums and EPs from the calendar year 2010.  I can't stress that enough, people.  Thus, reissues, singles, and compilations of previously-released/widely available stuff are disqualified.
• No, I didn't accidentally leave the Deerhunter album off the list.  The Deerhunter album is, in fact, horrible.
• Oh Don Piano.

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1.) Fang Island - Fang Island -- Ladies and gentlemen, set your serotonin glands to "monsoon!"  For those of us jaded bastards unaccustomed to the unconditional, massive outpouring of joy that's found on Fang Island, it may seem at first like there just has to be a catch somewhere.  The pixie dust has to wear off at some point, no?  I mean, did they spring fully-formed from Rick Nielsen's 5-neck?  Did they collectively make a deal with some sort of bizarro demon that allows them only to create perfect, fizzy, euphoric poppy prog-metal?  Or, alternately, are they *gasp* a Christian rock band? 

Fortunately not.  They are, however, a synthesis of some blue-chip musical acts: the fist-pumpin', arena-ready melodicism of Cheap Trick; the AOR prog arrangements (and sometimes-goofy synths) of Rush; the sheer joy of a Phish "Harry Hood" jam.  Moreover, they're able to transcend the seemingly obligatory navel gazing of most indie acts by unabashedly going for the home run ball where most indie "rockers" are okay with a sac bunt.  As such, if these guys don't have a major label deal by the next few months I will be very, very surprised.     

In closing, if you dislike this Fang Island album, you dislike joy.  That is all.

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2.) Beach House - Teen Dream -- Although I've liked much of Beach House's previous material, this album is the great leap forward that establishes Beach House as one of the world's finest bands.  Seriously.  Admittedly, there's a limited sonic palette that a band can traverse when their instrumentation consists simply of voice, guitar and piano, but there's more at play here thematically and texturally than one might originally notice at first listen.  [And more importantly, what a voice it is.] 

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3.) Gorillaz - Plastic Beach -- As someone with very little interest in/knowledge of all things hip hop, I would imagine that this album has pretty much all the hallmarks of a successful hip hop mixtape.  You have humor ("Superfast Jellyfish" is flat-out hilarious); guest spots both arresting (Bobby Womack on "Stylo") and super cool (Lou Reed's 'luded out turn on "Some Kind of Nature"); and flawless production (everywhere, but probably most notably the synths on "Glitter Freeze" and "Empire Ants").   

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4.) Marnie Stern - Marnie Stern -- On her third full-length, the femme fatale of fingertapping takes such a huge step forward that she nearly renders her previous output totally obsolete.  [Not really, but check it --  this is a really good album.]  The real improvements come not only in the songwriting, but also in the dynamics: would either of her previous albums have ventured into the self-assured stomp of "Her Confidence" or the rich emotional territory of the album-closing "The Things You Notice"?  Prob'ly not.  Of course, this is not to say that this an album of slow jams - in fact far from it - songs like "Cinco de Mayo" and "Gimme" still have the over-caffeinated freaky prog Stern's best known for. 

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5.) Mogwai - Special Moves (bonus edition) -- Yes, I know that I tend to like live albums more than most folks do, but if the idea of what basically amounts to a "best-of live" outing doesn't appeal to you, then it's doubtful you're a fan of the band in question.  Of course, I could have lived with a couple more tracks from '06's ridiculously underrated Mr. Beast, but then again that's my solution to everything.  Bonus points because I was actually at one of the three shows (at Music Hall of Williamsburg in April '09) that supplied the material for this release. 

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6.) Melvins - The Bride Screamed Murder -- Although the first two Melvins albums with Big Business' Jared and Coady were lean, mean riffin' machines, some longtime fans didn't really care for the perceived streamlining of the Melvins sound, presumably preferring some more typical Melvins "weirdness" weaved in n' out of the non-stop riffage.  I am not necessarily one of those people.  Personally, I thought (A) Senile Animal and Nude With Boots were the best things they'd done in the new millennium, but what do I know.  Anyway, The Bride Screamed Murder has plenty to satisfy both camps.  If you like experimental stuff, you've got Marine Corps-style marching chants, an impossibly sludgy cover of the Who's "My Generation," weird l'il interludes, and a lengthy sound collage at the end of the album.  And if you just like it when the Melvins rock the fuck out, songs like "Electric Flower" and especially the colossal "Pig House" will peel the paint off your house.

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7.) Liquor Store - Suckin on Mommy's Dick -- No, this album does not exist, since all Liquor Store has to their name release-wise is a 7" of "Trash Sandwich" b/w "Free Pizza."  But if it did exist, it would have likely beaten the everloving fuck out of most of the other namby pamby bullshit that came out this year. 

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8.) Holy Fuck - Latin -- Although this album has nothing as immediately great as LP's "Lovely Allen" or "Royal Gregory" (although "Silva and Grimes" and "Stay Lit" come close), Latin's seamless flow between tracks leads the listener through an intensely hypnotic soundscape.  [A plug for their live show: Holy Fuck are incredible live so get off yer ass and see them live when they come to your neck of the woods.]

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9.) The Austerity Program - Backsliders and Apostates Will Burn EP -- It's pretty rare that a band's live intensity is matched EXACTLY by its recorded output, but these guys' brutal arrangements and Albini-like recording techniques result in an album that practially reeks of blood, sweat and tears.  [No, not the band.]

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10.) Swans - My Father Will Guide Me Up a Rope to the Sky -- Embarrassingly, this is my first real exposure to Swans, other than a handful of tracks heard here and there.  Which is inexcusable, because this album to me sounds like a cross between Glenn Branca, Can's weightier stuff, Leonard Cohen and Harvey Milk, with some Tom Waits thrown in.  Terrifying and creepy and cacophonous and very unpleasant.   

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11.) Sleigh Bells - Treats -- You know what?  I like eMusic's review of this album so much that I'm just going to steal it. "The hip-hop beats sputter like someone dropped a boombox in a swimming pool. The gloriously cheeseball riffage could've been dubbed off an old Van Halen cassette. It's cheerleader music for punks. It's punk music for cheerleaders."  Right on. 

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12.) Metallica - Live at Grimey's -- The night before showing up at Bonnaroo, Metallica recorded this l'il tidbit in the basement of a Nashville record store, with the brief setlist comprising mostly songs from Metallica's "Before We Sucked" golden period.  Of course, I love a good live album as much as anyone, and I appreciate that Metallica made this available for purchase only at indie record stores, and all that happy horseshit.  What I think is self-parodyingly retarded was the grassroots campaign by internet Metallifans rabidly imploring people to "support Metallica by buying this limited release!!!11!1"  Yeah, you know what?  It really is about time that a little underdog indie act like Metallica got some support after years of toiling in obscurity.  Jackasses. 

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13.) Torche - Songs for Singles EP -- Superlative Sun State sludge supastahz pick up where '08's ridiculously good Meanderthal left off on this EP that somehow manages to leave a smile on yer fat face at the same time that it's bludgeoning you over the head with super duper riffs galore.  Now, if you're not used to sludgy music that has a sense of humor, fear not: watch the hilariously adorable official video for the song UFO for a quick primer on what makes Torche so great.

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14.) Kylesa - Spiral Shadow -- For all the brainless "hipster metal" crowing that this band endures, you'd think that they'd co-written these songs with Devendra and paid Sufjan to contribute melodica arrangements.  Well, they didn't, and there are moments on this album that straight fucking crush, as well as some much more textural stuff, supposedly influenced by the band's newfound love of Built to Spill.

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15.) Melvins - Melvins EP -- Gotta love the "quality material-to-crap" ratio on this one.  Includes three tracks.  The first: 8+ minute of the Wipers "Youth of America"/AWESOME.  The second: extended version of the ubercreepy "Dies Iraea" (a/k/a cover of the theme from The Shining) from Nude With Boots/AWESOME.  And the third: remix of "It Tastes Better Than the Truth" from the same album/MEH.  Well, you know what The Single Greatest Musical Artist In the History of Recorded Music has to say about that: .66666666666 repeating is none too shabby.

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16.) Bad Religion - 30 Years Live -- There are a few old chestnuts (think pre-All Ages) on this one, but I for one am impressed that the inventors of "melodic hardcore" managed to cobble together a decent live set like this one that so heavily features a lot of newer stuff.  If you're one of those people that thinks Bad Religion has been just releasing the same album for the last 16 years, it's doubtful this will do much to sway your opinion, but if you're not an asshole you should enjoy this. 

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17.) Harvey Milk - A Small Turn of Human Kindness -- For a band that's so distinctly steeped in creating artfully disturbing sludge, this album can be considered a bit of a career highlight (or lowlight).  Yes, here we have huge, steaming pile of unpleasantness, completely inappropriate for anyone who spends less than half their day plotting the deaths of themselves/others. 

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18.) Jonsi - Go --  If you favored the fruity felicity of the last Sigur Ros album, feel free to felch yourself with this frilly, fanciful, frolicy fudge-factory. 

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19.) The Thermals - Personal Life -- The most humorless and blatantly emo album that the Thermals have ever put out is also *SURPRISE* the worst album the Thermals have ever put out.  But it's still decent.  It's really to the band's credit that they're able to take a group of songs which aren't among their best, which are essentially about loathing/distrusting your significant other, and make it at least somewhat listenable. 

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20.) Arcade Fire - The Suburbs -- So, let me get this straight: in order to show how dreary, dull, and stifled suburban life is, Arcade Fire actually managed to write an album that is, for the most part, dreary, dull and stifled-sounding?  Huh.  Although this is pretty damn far from being a great album (and not even in the same species as Funeral or Neon Bible), you still have two legitimately great songs ("Sprawl II" and "Half Light II"), a few damn good ones ("We Used to Wait," "Rococo" and "Suburban War") and some near misses.  While Arcade Fire's first two full-lengths used depressing topics as the springboard for some of the best music of the millennium, Win n' Regine may need to mix it up a little.  Y'know, maybe write happy songs about happier stuff.  Hey, I got it!  Maybe Arcade Fire's next release should be written about this year's Fang Island album!  Yeah!  [crickets]

A Few Random Great/Horrible Moments From Shows I've Seen in 2010

    In no particular order........

 

--Faith No More covering "Ben" at the Brooklyn Waterfront.  [Yes, that "Ben".]

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--Some dude puked all over me during the Cheeseburger show at Knitting Factory.  [Mostly pizza and beer, methinks.]

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--During the Harvey Milk show at (le) poisson rouge in March, things seemed not to be going so well vis-a-vis the inter-band dynamic.  Bassist Stephen Tanner took the stage giving the crowd an emphatic "thumbs down," seemingly castigating us for cheering the Milk.  At one point, Creston Spiers suggested a song title (presumably one from their newest, bleakest record to date, A Small Turn of Human Kindness) to the other band members, only to have Tanner wearily admonish him: "oh really? Do we have to play another one of those death dirges?"  But Stephen, we *like* the death dirges.  Anyway, towards the end of the set, the band took a brief break, with Spiers mopping the sweat from his brow in silence and Tanner sipping from his beer.  Spirits seemed... not-so-high.  Right at this moment, an enterprising crowd member yelled out on behalf of everyone in the whole room: "OUR LOVE FOR YOU IS HIGHER THAN YOUR ASSESSMENT OF WHAT OUR LOVE COULD BE!" [For the uninitiated, that's a play on the title of this album.] The crowd applauded and the band smiled.  Yay.

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--Single favorite quote I've ever heard at any show ever (non-Robert Pollard division), from the frontman of Doomriders: "THIS SONG GOES OUT TO EVERYONE HERE WHO RIDES A FUCKING SKATEBOARD!!!!!"

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--Getting punched in the cock at Floor.  Brutal!

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--During an An Albatross set, some tiny dude in the middle of the pit hopped up on my back and began riding me around like a bucking bronco.  I was (obviously) trying to get him the fuck off of me, and as such I let my guard down for a minute... at which point I got kicked in the face, knocking my glasses clear off my face.  Amazingly, I managed to catch them in midair, miraculously saving them from meeting their untimely end on the floor of the pit.  "Holy shit," I thought to myself; "that was fucking awesome!"  This sentiment lasted approximately .000166678923 seconds before, you guessed it, somebody else punched me right in the fucking eye.  Tough crowd!

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--Somehow, my buddy Devin managed to get himself kicked out of a Cheeseburger show, which is not an easy thing to do.  Considering I've seen practically every Cheeseburger show over the last three or four years, I think it's pretty safe to say that before Devin I was the last person to get kicked out of a Cheeseburger show [at this utter debacle]. 

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--Fucking cops.  I was excited to finally see Smith Westerns in April when the five-oh busted the fuck in and shut Market Hotel down.  According to this, "all five of the summonses issued in relation to Market Hotel" were dropped - just classic "cops fucking with the kids" (errr, 30-somethings) bullshit. 

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--Um, apparently I was sitting only about 20 seats away from where this brain surgeon jumped from.  Yikes/there but for the grace of god go (tripping) I. 

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--'88 Mets masks and a GbV cover.   

Albums I've Heard So Far in 2010, From Best to Worst, With Exactly One Sentence Written About Each, Sorta [part 1]

    Bored; pissed off that I missed Crocodiles last night because I fucked my foot up by stepping on a bunch of pins and other sharp shit that had been left on the floor inexpicably (don't ask).  And there's little chance I'm going to brave the throngs of brainwashed AnCo worshippers at the Avey Tare-DJ'd Crocs show this Friday at Glasslands.  Frickity frack, y'all. 

    Anyhow, here's my favorite 20 albums I've heard so far this year, with a sentence written about each.  Keep in mind that there's all kinds of shit I haven't yet heard (just off the top of my head Zoroaster, Helmet, Swans, The Sword, Deerhunter, Grinderman, Kylesa, etc.), so expect this list to change size, shape and odor by the time I get around to pinching off my year-end lists.  We'll see how motivated I get to finish this off with another couple lists of ~20 albums in order of descending goodness, but for now sink your teef into this loaf. 

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1.) Fang Island - Fang Island -- How rare is it that the indie blogosphere actually embraces a band that goes "widdly widdly widdly" on lead guitar, and it's not this chick performing said widdly widdly?

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2.) Beach House - Teen Dream -- Stylistic limitations be damned, the melodies are just sooooooo damn sweet, delivered by means of the year's finest vocal performance.

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3.) Gorillaz - Plastic Beach -- Normally I hate anything even remotely hip-hop tinged, but this album has 4 important characteristics not present on many other hip hop recordings: 1.) humor; 2.) brains; 3.) guest appearances by legendary musicians; 4.) great, lush 80's-ish synth lines.

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4.) Mogwai - Special Moves -- Moggy live; I was at this show (as evidenced by the several times I'm visible in the accompanying "Burning" film); yippee!

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5.) The Austerity Program - Backsliders and Apostates Will Burn - Simply put, one of the most intense recordings you'll ever hear. 

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6.) Melvins - Melvins EP -- I talked some shit about this release earlier in the year, but two important facts need to be considered: 1.) "Dies Iraea" is fucking awesome, and 2.) since Electroretard is out of print, you need this for the fucking insane 8+ minute cover of The Wipers' Youth of America.

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7.) Melvins - The Bride Screamed Murder -- Not as lean and mean as the first two Big Business-augmented Melvins albums (for example, this album's final two tracks are beyond useless), but "Pig House" and "Electric Flower" fucking shred. 

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8.) Holy Fuck - Latin -- Not as melodically monolithic as their last one, although the unrelenting beats and flawless pacing make this the best workout album of the year (always a good idea to take your workout soundtrack advice from someone who's morbidly obese).

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9.) Arcade Fire - Suburbs -- Yes, there are several great songs on here, but plenty of skippable stuffs too. 

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10.) Sleigh Bells - Treats -- Yup, so I'm pretty much obsessed with Alexis Krauss and that's all there is to it.

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11.) The Thermals - Personal Life -- If you only like their faster stuff, you're going to want to skip this, but although the music is toned down, the caustic self-examination remains. 

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12.) Bad Religion - 30 Years Live -- Every live concert EVER BY ANYBODY should start with the song "Fuck Armageddon, This Is Hell."

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13.) Harvey Milk - Harvey Milk -- Don't worry, these guys hate themselves as much as you do.

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14.) Harvey Milk - A Small Turn of Human Kindness -- Bleak, bleak, bleak; like early-Swans bleak, man.

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15.) Surfer Blood - Astro Coast -- It's easy to dismiss this as just "Swim" plus a bunch of lesser crap, but this is a deceptively smart li'l record via "yay Beafi."

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16.) Lost in the Trees - All Alone in an Empty House -- Despite never having heard the Bon Iver album (and having no intention of ever doing so), I'm prepared to McConfirm that this album is way way better.

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17.) Torche - Songs for Singles EP -- Tasty stopgap tidbits (6 of the 8 songs are under 2:20) by the happiest, least straight sludge metal band that I know of.

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18.) Jonsi - Go -- If you liked the fruity optimism of the last Sigur Ros album, feel free to felch yourself with this frilly, fanciful, frolicy fudge-factory.

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19.) Crocodiles - Sleep Forever -- As spotty as it is bratty (like last year's Summer of Hate), but hot sandwich fuckin' damn is "Mirrors" incredible.

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[^in lieu of an actual album cover, which apparently doesn't exist on said intarwebz]

20.) The Netherlands - Fantasmatic -- Sick metal riffs, bull-in-a-china-shop rhythms, and plenty of goofiness.

The Best Albums of 2010 (so far)

2 1/2 months into the year and I've only heard 11 albums released in oh-ten.  Weak sauce, I know.  Here they are, from worst to first.

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11.) Robert Pollard - We All Got Out of the Army -- As Uncle Bob's solo releases have become progressively more and more blandly "mature" (and less rockin') over the years, they've also become less instantly accessible.  In other words, We All Got Out of the Army will likely take more than the one-full-time-thru listening allowance I've afforded it at this point in order to fully appreciate it.  But suffice it to say that my one-full-time-thru attempt at this one was less than pleasurable. 

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10.) Melvins - Melvins EP -- It's not that this release contains subpar material; it's just that the material is inessential.  To wit: includes 3 tracks: 1.) an extended version of the uber-creepy instrumental "Dies Iraea" from Nude with Boots, 2.) a remix of that same album's "It Tastes Better Than the Truth," and, 3.) a fantastic 9+ minute cover of the Wipers' "Youth of America."  The Wipers cover alone would singlehandedly make this EP worthwhile IF IT WASN'T THE EXACT SAME VERSION OF THE SONG ALREADY AVAILABLE ON ELECTRORETARD.  Meh, but stay tuned for the full length Melvins album that's due in June.

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9.) Pierced Arrows - Descending Shadows -- Venerable liferz still kickin' down a slovenly garagey ruckus.

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8.) Acrassicauda - Only the Dead See the End of the War -- Of course, this band's backstory is incredible, and you really have to root for them, and all that stuff.  [Come to think of it this album probably deserves some sort of Best Album award just for the fact that it exists.]  The music is good, but among current Big Four-influenced thrash revivalists, is this really any better than, say, last year's Children album?  Probly not.

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7.) Surfer Blood - Astro Coast -- "Swim" is undeniably awesome, but everything else is pretty generic, no?  Seriously, what's your second favorite song on this album?

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6.) The Magnetic Fields - Realism -- After their excellent adventure into the sordid depths of gratuitous JaMC-style guitar feedback (2008's aptly-titled Distortion), Stephin Merritt and crew hop right back into glistening, impeccably-produced chamber pop.  Unfortch the songwriting is more I than 69 Love Songs on this one.

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5.) High on Fire - Snakes for the Divine -- High on Fire has always been a band that I've felt I should love more than I actually do.  That sentiment continues on this, yet another solid-yet-unspectacular album of stoner riffs and snarling. 

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4.) Beach House - Teen Dream -- While there's no individual song on here as great as, say, "Heart of Chambers," this is one heck consistently good front-to-back album, way more so than Devotion or the debut EP. 

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3.) Harvey Milk - Harvey Milk -- As the story goes, the material for this album was recorded by Shellac's Bob Weston in 1994, with the master tapes mailed off to some dude in Chicago who had promised to release the album.  Sadly, he never did, and the band neither heard from said Chicago dude again, nor did they ever see their masters again.  So, was the 16 years worth the wait, especially considering that each of the tracks on this album were eventually re-recorded/re-released on subsequent albums?  Dude, it's early Harvey Milk.  So a very, very vehement yes. 

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2.) Fang Island - Fang Island -- These guys are so exuberantly joyous that at first I was suspicious that they were a Christian Rock group, albeit one that writes great songs and has incredible chops.  Fortunately they're not a Christian Rock group (um, I don't think).  I first saw these guys perform about a year and a half ago and their hyper-caffeinated, tuneful blend of power pop and AOR-style prog definitely manages to shine through on this record (even if the vocals sound kind of like AnCo by way of "Cotton-Eyed Joe" at times).

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1.) Titus Andronicus - The Monitor -- Patrick Stickles is probably the most quotable lyricist going today, and on The Monitor he's able to make his catharsis-mongering work despite shedding the most awesome aspect of The Airing of Grievances' soundscape: the massive, all-encompassing wall-of-guitars production.  Of course, the quieter production winds up placing The Monitor's sonic emphasis squarely on Stickles' out-of-tune warble, which can be grating at times.  But through the course of all the destructive behavior and self-loathing catalogued on this album, it winds up being an affirming, uplifting, remarkable set of tunes, *poifect* for sentimental jackasses like me. 

Torche and Harvey Milk with Pollution at Music Hall of Williamsburg, July 27, 2009

    

TORCHE ^

 

HARVEY MILK ^

    I've been looking forward to this show for quite awhile... it's kind of a sludge dream bill, no?  During the calendar year 2009 there's no band I've listened to more (as confirmed by my iTunes play counts) than the mighty Harvey Milk, and this would be the first time I've ever seen 'em live.  And although I've already seen Torche three times before, this would be the first time I've seen them as a full-fledged headliner.  Love love love these bands.

    Puffed a couple of bowls before heading out towards Music Hall of Williamsburg, making it past the Snoop-lookalike bouncer and inside the venue before 9.  (Preshow music was Clash, I think.)  The first band, the four-piece Pollution, didn't take the stage until well after 9, plying the crowd with their brand of downtuned, angst-y metal.  Influence-wise, these guys seemed to draw a lot from the usual '90s NYC hardcore/metal hybrid mainstays as well as the classic AmRep sound from the same basic time period.  Enjoyable.

    After an excessively long setbreak (over 35 minutes, more than long enough for the in-house soundguy to play the entirety of Death From Above 1979's You're a Woman, I'm a Machine album), Harvey Milk took the stage.  Vocalist/guitarist Creston Spiers looked like Hell's Own Janitor dressed in a one-piece charcoal jumpsuit, with greasy locks framing a weatherbeaten face.  A wholly appropriate appearance for the man whose legendary full-throated bellow makes it sound like he's passing a kidney stone the size (and shape) of a hedgehog.  Starting off with the lugubrious "I Got a Love" set the basic tone for the evening -- lumbering sludge in heaping doses -- with the tempo occasionally sped up with the inclusion of songs like 2008's single-tastic "Motown" and a trio of tracks from Pleaser ("Shame," "Misery," "Lay My Head Down") and slowed down with impossibly syncopated material like "Love Swing."  Indeed, this was some bass-heavy, brutal fare which exacerbated my preexisting migraine and at times seemed to be nearly shaking my fillings loose.  Kudos, gentlemen.

    Up next: the evening's second power trio, Torche.  As I mentioned this was the fourth time I've seen these guys, with each successive concert I've attended revealing a little something more.  When I saw them opening for Mogwai in May '06, I thought, "man, they're heavy."  When I saw them last July with Boris, I thought, "goddamn these guys sure have fun onstage."  When I saw them opening for Dredg in April, I thought "Dredg is horrible.  Torche should be headlining this."  And at this show I kind of realized that these guys are absolutely one of the finest live bands currently going.  Of course, for me the highlight of the set was "Across the Shields" (my third-favorite song of last year), during which vocalist/guitarist Steve Brooks blissfully hopped across the stage, performing high kicks, mugging shamelessly and generally just havin' a good ol' time.  I don't know how to play guitar, but hot damn I bet that'd be a fun song to play... or maybe it's just that these guys play with such vigor, animation and pure joy, they make it seem that way.  

    Post-show I was disappointed to learn that the Harvey Milk merch table had sold out of Anthem DVD sets, so for a cool $5 I snagged a poster from a Denton, TX show earlier in the year instead.  The poster has an image of an anvil on it, which could reference any number of things: 1.) the song "The Anvil Will Fall," one of the finest songs ever written by anybody; 2.) The song "All The Live Long Day" on which an anvil is actually used as percussion, or 3.) Anvils are fucking heavy.  Harvey Milk, too, is fucking heavy.  Although I'm kind of regretting not buying these, which they were also selling.  Haha.   

   

Catchin' Up With the Blog yet again

    Ah, the weather is getting nice again and I'm starting to remember why I love my neighborhood so much.  Schoolkids are running around in the streets loudly debating the pungency of one another's genitals; the Ice Cream Truck Jingle (which I'm actually a fan of) is already soldered into my skull where it shall remain for the next 4+ months; 60 year old dudes can be found stumbling around the block smoking blunts; drunk black dudes fly by on bicycles insulting random passersby; and perhaps most importantly, "special deliveries" are transacted courteously, comfortably and efficiently. 

    Again it's been awhile since I've updated said Muddd, but I ain't dead yet.  I've been taking it easy the last couple weeks after what has been an unusually toxic year up until this point.  Also, earlier in the month I traveled to Atlantic City (impossible to enjoy this place without drugs/fortunately I had some), Virginia (beautiful, especially the ships) and Durham (rainy) so it's nice to hunker down and get back to the essentials -- namely smoking weed and being antisocial. 

    Also, it's a good time for me to issue some, um, "updates" to last year's Best Of lists (albums and songs), so let's get these belated mea culpas out of the way first.  "But Tuddd," you plead, "yer livin' in the past!  We want to hear about new shit!"  Sadly, we're almost done with March and the New Yeah Yeah Yeahs is the first really, really good record I've heard all year.  Fear not, I thought '07 got off to a shitty start too and we still wound up with a ton of gooduns when all was said and done.  Anyway,  

• All thru '08, I avoided hearing the Titus Andronicus album mainly because of comparisons to Conor Oberst (of whom I'm not a fan) and various emo bands.  Well, it turns out I fucked up-- the Titus Andronicus album is probably the best album from '08.  Yeah, I'm'a need a mulligan on that one, thanks.
• Also, I totally whiffed in leaving Harvey Milk's Life... The Best Game in Town off of the aforementioned list.  In this case, I had actually heard the album during '08 proper (and several times at that) but I somehow retardedly managed to miss giving it a numerical ranking on the spreadsheet I was using to rank albums.  Let this be a warning to all fellow hack music bloggers: (underwhelming) music journalism and spreadsheets do not mix.  FWIW it's one of the 10 best albums from '08 I've heard.
• Missed the boat on Hercules and Love Affair, too.  Shee-it.
• In my (admittedly gay) quest to trendily update my library of garagey shit, I came across a fucking awesome compilation of female-fronted Dutch garage/psych bands, called From the Kitchen to the Garage and available from Distortions Records here (it's the third one down).  Normally I don't post links prompting people to buy shit, but 1.) it's awesome and 2.) it's only 7 friggin' dollars.  Definitely the first album I've heard from the Distortion imprint, but I doubt it will be the last.  I have no idea if this actually came out in '08, but if it did, it too would have been easily in the year's top 10. 
• I'm liking Microcastle better and better, but I still think Weird Era kind of blows.
• On the aforementioned Best Songs list, I totally left several great songs off that I didn't hear until after I wrote the list.  These include: a lot of the Titus Andronicus album, a few off Harvey Milk's record, the same two that everyone likes from Hercules and Love Affair, "Afgrunden" from Sune Rose Wagner (of the Raveonettes, of course)'s solo debut, Pyramids' "The Echo of Something Lovely," "That's Not My Name" by the Ting Tings, and, um, Usher's "Love in this Club." For some reason, this makes me want to cry with joy. 

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        Here's a brief rundown of the albums I've heard so far in '09.  Yes, I'm markedly behind last year's pace, but there's still a ton of good stuff I'm looking forward to.  I'll try to get a decent "Still To Come in '09" list posted before I go away for the weekend.

    1- Yeah Yeah Yeahs - It's Blitz -- I've only owned this album for 5 hours so this may be premature, but I think this is the best thing the YYY's have ever put out.  I thought their '07 EP, Is Is was their best effort to date (great songwriting and production) but this likely tops it.  Although a few of the songs are marred by repetitive phrasing, there's undoubtedly some really pretty songs on this. 

    2- Dan Deacon - Bromst -- lots more heart and depth than his Spiderman of the Rings breakthru. 

    3- Heartless Bastards - The Mountain -- Face it, it's tough for a white chick to sing soulfully without sounding cheesy, but the vocals (and primal guitar playing) of frontwoman Erika Wennerstrom make me long for a Black Keys/Heartless Bastards double bill.

    4- Death - ...For the Whole World to See -- A set of mostly unreleased protopunk songs by this trio of Detroit siblings, recorded in the mid '70s.  "Politicians in My Eyes" and "Keep on Knockin'" are the best two on here.  Read this New York Times article for the full story.

    5- Dead Mellotron - Ghost Light Constellation EP -- Pretty sure this Monroe, Louisiana band friended me on MySpace, where this album is available for free download, which is how I heard of 'em.  The best songs on here are done in kind of a fuzzy garage-ambient-trance-shoegaze style, which can lend itself to absolute awesomeness under the right circumstances.  Bonus points for choosing the right song to cover in Beach House's "Saltwater."

    6- Animal Collective - Merriweather Post Pavillion -- So far I'm only enjoying this as background music at a chatty party, for example.  Obviously warrants more listens.

    7- Boston Spaceships - The Planets Are Blasted -- Also needs many more listens, although this might be Uncle Bob's strongest (non-archival) effort since 2006's Normal Happiness. 

    8- These Arms Are Snakes - Tail Swallower and Dove -- Love the lead track "Woolen Heirs," and "Ethric Double" boasts the best heavy groove of the year.

    9- Franz Ferdinand - Tonight: Franz Ferdinand -- The single's the only memorable song, IMHO.

    10- Wavves - Wavvves -- Whatever, I'm old.  I don't have to pretend to enjoy this crap.

    11- The Soft Pack -- The Muslims -- Sure, I'm spoiled when it comes to sloppy garage stuff, but this album is nothing special.

    12- Nodzzz -- Nodzzz -- If you're into bands like Vivian Girls, ca-USE! co-MOTION! and the Beets, you'll eat this up.  Otherwise, you'll find it pretty generic. 

    (No, I haven't heard the new Mastodon yet... I'm waiting to blast it in my car on the way down to Pennsylvania for a wedding this weekend.)

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    Finally, yes, I know I've been slacking on seeing shows this year; I'm only up to 17 so far, which is pretty piss poor.  That being said, barring random testicular electrocution (always a possibility) I plan on attending tomorrow (4/1)'s whiplash-inducing show at Europa, starring the mighty Young Widows (seen 'em several times, they're great), Tournament (saw 'em a couple years ago with Baroness and Atakke at Don Pedros/they shred) and Austerity Program (one of my faves).  Good times. 

    All right, gotta go.  Muddd outward and such.