This fine evening, I attended the Cheeseburger show at Knitting Factory. Here are some things that happened!
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- My buddy Devin came over for some pregame. As per usual, we drank heavily, and as a result I was in fucking terrible shape when we finally stumbled the fuck out of my apartment. Let's just say several a capella versions of Melvins' "Suicide in Progress" were performed.
- Met up w/Sluggo and his gf at the show. Began drinking Tecates because it's apparently fucking Cinco de Mayo, beetchez.
- I had seen -- and enjoyed the shit out of -- opening band Hard Nips last time I saw Cheeseburger, at Bell House in mid-March. With this band, it's all about how much fun they're having onstage, and how unless you're a total asscunt you have to love watching them perform. Tonight they brought their super-excited brand of 2-chord Joan Jett-style rawk to my neighborhood (literally, a half mile from my doorstep!). This was Hard Nips' record release show and, predictably, I got so fucked up that I forgot to buy their album. That sucks, because I don't think their shit is available on eMusic, iTunes, Amie Street, or anywhere. FUCK!!! If you can hook me up with this please don't hesitate to contact me- I will pay $ for a hardcopy.
- Talked with the 'burger band members pre-show and I learned that 1.) original 'burger singer Joe Bradley was in the house, and he was planning to perform. Yay! and, 2.) no clue when the new 'burger album is coming out. Boo!
- Set opened with "Easy Street," and the band busted through a ton of the classics ["Derby Day," "Jellybean," "Tiger," "Money for the Heart," a couple of new ones named "Winner" and "Suzie," and probably some more shit I should remember but don't].
- I can't speak for the whole crowd because I was (of course) stationed at the edge of the stage all night, but up front things were pretty hectic. Some tiny blonde chick ripped my loungy fat guy shirt off twice.
- Ok, fine. Self-indulgent bullet point: I sang on "Easy Street" and "Derby Day" briefly before being pulled onstage for part of "Tiger." Good shit. Devin probably spent more time onstage than I did.
- "New" vocalist Jayson Greene rocked the house. There were plenty of equipment problems, but that's what happens when you decide to stage your concert at a beer-throwing contest. Kinda wonder if this type of deal is some sort of electrocution hazard.
- My ankles are seriously fucked up. Otherwise, I feel as though a garbage truck ran me over at full speed.
- At one point the singer jumped off the stage and (perhaps by design) I was the only asshole that caught him. As a result, currently I can't turn my neck to the right.
- Said stagedive occurred during "Money for the Heart," right during the "we're gonna make it!" section. I was so drunk at that point that I thought exclaiming "we didn't make it!" was the funniest thing a human's ever said. Kill me.
- Spongebob made an appearance, in pinata form. Remember when back in the day Cheeseburger brought pinatas to their shows and people would get conked by the huge flying beasts? That was awesome.
- For the last song of the set, Joe Bradley took the stage for an awesomely feces-encrusted version of "Do You Remember." Just as the song was starting, somebody THREW UP ALL OVER ME. Post show I took inventory and it appeared to be a massive beer-boot, with perhaps 3 or so slices of pureed pizza mixed in up in that shit.
- I can't stress enough how totally trashed the room was by the end of the set. There were beercans hanging from the stage lights, for fuck's sake. I would seriously doubt Knitting Factory will ever let them play there again. Good work, folks!
- Best show I've seen all year.
